Joy in the Present Moment

It's been a week since I decided to spend some time with my baby boy- and joy of joys, he is thriving once more! I took him to the park and let him play in the sand, I let him loose in the children's library while I sat nearby with an unopened book, and on days when I don't feel like going in the car, I took him out on a stroll around the neighbourhood block. I went out more for his sake rather than mine; if it were up to me I'd rather hole myself with a good book or surf on the Internet.

I tend to live in my head a lot. It wasn't a problem when I'd only myself to think about. My husband certainly doesn't need me to keep him entertained all day (more likely he's the one who has to keep me happy). But having a baby changes everything. It meant having to integrate this little person with big needs into my lone ranger lifestyle, a transition which has not been quite so easy.

Alhamdulillah, the Almighty recognises my need to grow and sent me this little person to develop parts of me which lies dormant. It forces me to crack open my cerebral shell and find joy in the present moment. Dr. Sears, a pediatric expert and author of 'The Baby Book' assures me that children and their play remind us that “life is at its best when we take time to relax, use our imagination, and just have fun.”

And indeed, it is fun to forget about myself for a moment and spend time with my baby. To share his delight as he bangs away on the pots and pans oblivious to the ear-splitting noise he is making, or to see the earnestness on his face as he attempts to sweep the floor with a brush and dustpan, all these joy-filled moments are mine for the taking if only I choose to surrender my own needs and expectations.

Playing and spending time with our children may not be intellectually stimulating. But it is important as we're building a connection. We reap the rewards in the form of trust, discipline, and self-esteem as they get older, Insha'Allah. "You're letting your child know that you care about her and her world,” says Dr. Sears. “All of these factors contribute to your child's developing sense of competence and confidence.”

A while back when I was occupied with getting things done around the house, poor Alipuddin' seems to have lost interest in food. I should have known something was off when even nursing holds no favour for my breast-milk guzzling baby. Ali was essentially trying to tell me that he needed me, but I was too busy with my own to-do list to notice. While I got a lot done in the house, my poor son was hungry for my love and attention.

Alhamdulillah for this change of perspective. I am happy to report that more often than not, my days are blurring from one blissful moment to the next. Although hard days are inevitable, especially the past couple of days when he had a slight fever and thus would cling to me like velcro, it is less of a struggle now that I decide to step out of my head for my baby and live in the here and now so I may profit in the Hereafter.

I am always reminded of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) who never fails to show kindness and compassion to children. Without a doubt he is the best example on how we should treat our children.